Thank you for all your correspondence sent to me.
In the first place, I hope you liked the Christmas presents I got you for 2010.
I regret to say it but I was unable to give you the metal pin slingshot, nor the indoor fireworks set. Those items are listed as hazardous and mustn’t be distributed…
I truly appreciate your concern about my health. Nevertheless I am not intending to shed a pound. To be honest, I have always been a little … fleshy if you like. Times are changing and i know people expect celebrities to look like sticks these days but “Thank God” I don’t live in Hollywood, so no need for me to slim down!
Each time I go to LA, I wonder when I’ll see an A4-size picture of my behind with a tear in my red trousers, flashing at me from a cover of a glossy mag. And believe me it is not easy to sneak away from paparazzi when getting off my sleigh or climbing up a chimney. Read more